Funeral

Dear Family, I must tell you about the funeral I
attended yesterday. Last Sunday as Bro. Malumalu was
teaching his Sunday School class he had a stroke and
after 2 days on life support he passed away. He was
about 6'2", handsome, articulate, and one of the best
teachers I've ever heard in my life. He was 50 years
old. It was a shock for the entire ward where he was
bishop at one time. He left a wife and 5 children
ranging from 10 to 18 years old. He was loved. The
funeral was Saturday and it was a very moving
experience. It started 1 hour late because they had
to wait for the body to be brought from the mortuary
and the family who were with the body. About 40
family members came in following the casket with much
wailing and crying and sobbing.....it was very loud.
I learned from my So. African friend who was sitting
next to me that some of those crying and wailing were
hired to do the sobbing. After they sat down, all was
reverent and quiet for a moment and then the 17 years
old daughter started waving her arms and crying and
sobbing out loud in anguish. That went on for 2-3
minutes and then she stopped. She had run away from
home 2 months before and had come home the night
before her father died. That was a blessing....they
made peace, but it was hardest on her. Then the
funeral began and the one conducting asked that the
visitors not smoke or drink on the grounds and he also
asked that there would be a reverent service. The
first 2 speakers were so eloquent and they were so
touching. They gave such peace a comfort to the
family as they spoke. Then the 5 children sang , "I
know that My Redeemer Lives". The boy played the
piano and the 4 girls or I should 3 girls sang...the
4th was just too overcome and had to sit down. Then
there were 7 or 8 testimonials by family members from
Congo....they were mostly in French...some had
translators and some didn't. One was speaking and
asked his friend on the spur of the moment to come up
and play the piano and sing.....he wasn't fabulous but
it was from his heart and as he sang many in the
sudience sang the song softly with him.....it was most
touching. Then the 15 yearold spoke about an essay
that she had just written for an english class....it
was about her father and how she loved and respected
him and that her dream was one day to be able to buy
him a landrover so they could take the family on trips
into the bush and have a great time. She said I
didn't know that he would be takin a different ride.!
It also was so touching. After the closing prayer the
widow who was sitting on the front row started shaking
her arms high above her head and she wailed and sobbed
and cried and then the casket went out to the Relief
Socity room and all of the family followed wailing and
screaming and crying and sobbing....including the paid
mourners. As they did this very very slowly then
every second or two someone would rise from the
audience and would give a loud cry or wail and it
seemed to it was to let that mother and family know
that they were deeply mourning with them. When they
got to the RS room you knew when they had opened the
casket for viewing as the wailing level went up 100%.
I truly was touched that they were able to mourn in
such a way that many of us have felt at times, but
because of our traditions we seem to keep bottled up
except in private. I was really in awe at the new and
old traditions coming together. There was the proper
service as well as the part of mourning that I'm sure
these people had seem their mothers and fathers and
grandparents do. It was very touching to me to bring
every aspect of mourning and learning and comfort into
the realm of the day.They were ALL in African or
Congolese dress as that is where his home is. That
was a magnificent sight. I felt it a privilege to
know him and learn from him. The flowers were so
simple....something that of course I would notice.
Two little glasses of yellow daffodils were put on a
stand and then they brought another little glass of
purple sweet peas to compliment the yellow. It was so
simple and lovely and appropriate to the
circumstances. The women of the ward fixed a feast
for everyone who came. That toowas sooooo touching as
many of these people can't afford to feed themselves.
We didn't stay for the viewing or the food but I truly
felt it a privilege to be part of such a poignant day.
Incidentally, he was teaching about life after death
when he collapsed. What irony.